Founder, editor and most prolific writer for Miami of Brohio. "I want you to leave it all to me. Go on, go back to the party."
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Contributors:
In corner one we have Brogina George, a sup par academic who strictly relies on gypsy magic and dumb luck to succeed. Providing Brohio with the female perspective on the elite lifestyle that Miami students live. Brogina George is the queen bee or whatever is the equivalent of an alpha male. She wears heels bigger than your dick. Currently in Ireland getting drunk and playing pro field hockey or something.
Vincent Van Bro:
Vincent Van Bro is our in-house brotoshop wizard. Kids got skills.
Take one part brilliance, one part charm, and a whole scoop of arrogance and you have the man, the myth, the legend: Sandy Brofax. Regularly throwin' back bourbon like a laser over the plate and smashin' bitties like top deck homers, this bro will fuck you up with some truth on all things sartorial.
Keyzer Broze:
On the day of his birthday, the cops once came to the house of Keyzer Broze to shut down his birthday party due to noise violations. Broze looked at his family, pulled out his gun, then used it to open beer cans for everyone to shotgun, including the cops. After shotgunning the beers, the cops apologized for being dicks, and the greatest party of all time continued.
Double Bro Seven:
You only get your Double Bro license after you’ve killed 2 beers….within 3 seconds. I’ve been lying low in Oxford for a while. Blending in, observing from afar, analyzing the situations around me, and then moving in with my dapper good looks and personality that could stun you like fence the surrounds the T-Rex enclosure at Jurassic Park. You know the Dos Equis man? I don’t find him that interesting.
Lindsay Brohan:
Hailing from the Midwest, Brohan is just your above average slam giving her input on all things Miami. She has the libido of Sasha Grey, the brains of Olivia Munn, and the asshole witticism of Ari Gold. Here to bitch about inane students and bring Brogina spiked coffee.
She doesn’t hate you cause you’re fat, you’re fat because she hates you
Notorious B.R.O:
Relax and take notes.....A born again bro, literally, I have risen from the dead to bring my fellow bros and lady-bros a little orgasm to their ears. I left the hard rhymes in the grave and aim to bring a new perspective on what music is. Look for new names and new sounds as I aim to please the parts beneath your snapback. I'm always looking for new sounds so if you have any suggestions please send them my way.
Abroham Lincoln:
If you can't see him it isn't because he isn't there. He's just wearing camo.
The Big Lebroski:
He had the first ever case of Senioritis. Aside from binge drinking, scantily clad women, and music so loud it blows the clothes off said women, his interests include skeet shooting, architecture, and extreme kayaking. A master of all trades, this bro is sick and that's not just my opinion, man.
Angelina Brolie:
Teddy Broosevelt:
Ron Brogundy:
Why, hello there. I'm Ronald Joseph Aaron Brogundy. Scotch, sluts and steaks are a part of my daily routine.
